Defeated

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Well, I had this great idea about a year ago. I was in Michaels looking for some HTV when I saw easter baskets on clearance. I was like I can but these now, then when Easter comes next year I’ll make them up and sell them. So I planned all year as I was also trying to set up an ecommerce store. And let me tell you I am no IT person. I don’t know much about setting up the page so it flows and all that IT stuff. I thought as soon as I put up the baskets they would fly out the store. (DEFEATED) I didn’t sell ONE basket. Now of course I had some valentines things up when valentine’s day came and went NOTHING sold. I didn’t even try St. Patrick’s Day. I went all out for easter. I had beautiful easter wreaths, and decorations and the easter baskets. I have only sold one item, and my sister bought earrings for her daughter.

Lets just say if you don’t have big bucks to pay for advertising you will get nowhere. I am an introvert. I tend to overthink things and talk myself out of doing something for fear of failure. So I fail myself before I even have a chance.

I really feel like I make beautiful stuff, just no one sees it because I hold myself back. For fear of being laughed at. You see here I don’t hear the people laughing because this is just words on a phone screen. Of course my family will shlw support in front of me. But I don’t feel it’s genuine. No one here will even see this. I am going to complete my contract and by November it will be official that I have failed once again. You’d think I’d be used to it by now. But let me tell you it still stings and each failure seem to sting a little deeper.