Parenting.

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Parenting in my opinion is the hardest, yet most rewarding job. The cost for daycare is outrageous in some states. Click the link below if you’re curious at the cost of daycare. Also I’m pretty sure if the child is in school the cost is different. However it’s still shocking to say the least.

https://worldpopulationreview.com/state-rankings/child-care-costs-by-state

I am in no way a “rich” person. I’ve only ever had average jobs, with most often an average pay. Then I landed a job that started me at $8.00 an hour I thought wow FINALLY a job that doesn’t pay minimum wage. ( of course that was when minimum wage was $5.15 an hour). I REALLY thought I was making money. I was blessed and thankful my Granny was still alive to baby sit my son. I went back to work when he was a year old. I wanted to stay home with him, but that was not in God’s plans. So granny babysat him while I worked. I of course paid her for her time. She didn’t feel right charging me because we are family. I told her regardless of being family I think it’s only right to pay you because I would surely be giving a daycare my check.

This blog was supposed to be about parenting, and I’m fixing to go off on a rant about financials. Ok let me focus. As I was saying parenting is hard work yet rewarding at the same time. I stayed home with my son the first year. I thoroughly enjoyed watching him grow in that short time. It felt like he went from totally dependant on me to asserting his independence in the blink of an eye. One day I’m nursing him softly singing to him, gently caressing his little head, feeling a tight grip of his little hand around my finger…then bam he’s walking trying to do his own thing. It happens so fast it’s practically a blur. My son will be 30 years old in just over a week. Where did the years go. All those sleepless nights when he was a baby ( at times) seemed endless, yet now I wish I could hold him in my arms and keep him safe again.

I enjoyed so much of the little things like when they learn and discover new things, or find their little toes and chew on them. So cute as the years go by school becomes a part of their routine. We had a bedtime and every night as his bedtime came around, I used to sit in a chair and open my arms wide and say ” the gates are closing”. He knew that meant a bedtime story. He would run to get a book for me to read. His favorite book was 1 Fish 2 Fish Red Fish Blue Fish. Of course I read it like it was the first time every time.

First it’s grammar school and you think oh my he’s not going to do well because ( typically the child cries) but he didn’t. I told him I would be back later to get him and he said ok. So much runs through your mind as a mother. What if he gets hurt? What if he falls off the swing, or any playground toy for the kids to climb on.

He is an only child, what if he don’t share because he never had to at home. Soooo many what if’s run through your mind. But when I told him I would be back later to get him and he said ok gave me a kiss and sent me on my way (my cousin was there and she expected him to cry and was shocked when he didn’t.) I thought about it the whole time he was in school, and then it hit me. Why he didn’t cry.

I always kept my word to him. If he was acting bad I gave him a warning, and told him what the penalty would be if he didn’t straighten up. Yes, he did try me a couple of times. There was one time in particular. I had took my mom (his grandma) to the store. She wanted to cash her check and pick up a few groceries. Now being as grandma was around my son thought nows a good time to push the envelope. I gave him his typical warning, BUT he did not heed to it. Mom was at the booth so I informed her we would be right back. Mom turns around. Now by this time my son and I are half way down the aisle heading towards the restrooms. When mom says “where y’all going?” And with out missing a beat my son looks back and says “we’ll be right back grandma mom’s gonna spank my butt” It was all I could do not to laugh and keep my game face on. Even the people in close proximity heard him and they just busted out laughing. No. I didn’t spank him. But I gave him a stern talking to. It was funny because he said at as it was a matter of fact he’s about to get a whoopin. That was the one and only time I didn’t follow through with a consequence. But in all honesty he really wasn’t a bad child. He learned quickly that if I say you will get a spaking if you misbehave he KNEW that will happen. So he knew I WILL be back to pick him up.

He’ll be 30 yrs old next week! I can’t believe it. It just happened so quick. Now I see him for a brief time on weekends. I mean it’s been like that for a while. He comes to my place Fridays after work. He usually works on Saturday so he leaves for work from my place. Truth is he comes to my place on weekends so I can cook his lunches for the following week and wash his clothes and this is when you say “a mothers work is never done” I don’t mind doing it because he has always been appreciative of everything I do. A few years ago we worked at the same company. There was one coworker who was pregnant with her first child. One day out of the blue she says to me. ” I like you and your sons relationship” I smiled with pride and said thank you. She proceeded to tell me that she hopes she and her baby has the same as me and my son. Also there was an Asian lady who worked there. Her english was rough, but I was able to decipher what she tried to say. And she had said to me “your son love you a lot” Then Mothers Day came and the sweet lady asked me what my son got me for mother’s day. I told her nothing. Because he don’t need a specific day out of the year to show me he loves me. He shows me every day.

To be honest I never really cared for holidays like Mother’s Day or Valentine’s Day. Maybe it’s just me, but I go by your actions on a daily basis that tell me you love me. What I mean by actions is the amount of respect not only that you show towards me, but how you present yourself to others. Letting them know you have a mother who taught right from wrong. Because when we are raising our children, we are raising them to be independent, self sufficient and being kind and respectful towards other. I had a complete stranger ( once he realized who my son was) tell me he’s a good kid, he’s kind. I know it sounds like I’m bragging on my child, I may be. But I am so proud of him. And thats when you realize how rewarding parenting is.

You think the younger years are hard. No no no, those are the easiest years. Those years you can keep them safe under your parental wing. It’s they years that THEY are spreading their wings and flying that are hard. You know your child is capable of doing things, but you still want them tucked safely under your wing. Now I wait to be Granny B. Soon

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